SEXUAL HEALTH CLINIC
August 29th 2007 14:21
Jude and I went to a sexual health clinic. I’m assuming that he went because of the itch he’s been having lately. I, a conservative virgin, of course, merely went for journalistic reasons...
I had fun waiting for the nurse. The waiting room was filled with all sorts of different people. Each time a new person would come into the room, everyone would look to see if they knew them. We were all trying to guess what STDs the different people had. The old man who wouldn’t sit down probably caught Herpes from an overseas “business trip.” The couple by the corner probably had Chlamydia. The blonde girl near the drinking tap (who turned out to be someone from one of my lectures) probably just had crabs.
As I was about to have my consultation, Jude whispered, “Oh, and they might inject your penis hole.”
The nurse who treated me asked several, several personal questions:
How many partners have you had?
Have you had sex with a male?
Have you ever had anal sex?
Are you a homosexual?
Have you ever been to prison?
Have you ever had any liquids transmitted onto your face?
Do you drink much? Do you ever get plastered?
Have you given her oral sex? Have she given you oral sex?
Have you ever had sex without a condom?
Have you ever been with a prostitute?
Do you have rashes on your balls?
Do you feel your balls? You should get to know them more.
The nurse paused for a moment, looked at my groin, and asked: Do you want me to look at it?
I asked: Is it necessary?
He said: In your case, not really. But I can if you want.
I said: That’s okay.
The nurse then asked me to lay on a bed. He put rubber gloves on and took out a syringe. For a moment, I actually believed he would inject my penis. Instead, though, he injected my arm to check for AIDS, Hepatitis C, Syphilis and Herpes. He then asked me to pee in a cup.
According to the nurse, Chlamydia and Herpes are both STDS that can actually show no signs for years. Herpes can be treated, but it can’t be cured. STDs can actually kill you.
Anyway, with all the people having unprotected sex now, merely having leaking or weird looking genitals are not clear indicators of having STDs. I truly mean this when I say, Get yourself checked before spreading the love, because you’re going to – ahem – screw a lot of people up.
Or how about just not have sex?
There should be a free clinic in your city. In Brisbane, it’s called “Biala City Community Health Centre.” They also give you free condoms and lubricants. Just do a google on it.
Jessica's blog, Health 2 Know, has some pretty informative entries on STDs.
A girl I know is allergic to latex, so the only way she can have sex is by her partner not wearing a condom.
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Comment by Ash
Flashes of memories
Good for you getting checked out! Coming from a country that is RIFE with AIDS and STD's I cringe when I hear of how everyone so readily jumps into bed with everyone else.
Spreading the news is a great, great movie, especially for a guy your age. Good for you!
Ash
Comment by Lara M
Love Speaks
Food Slate
One can never be too safe... It still amazes me to know that there are still some who think they're invincible...
p/s...tell that girl there are non-latex condoms...
Comment by Always Eighteen
Always Eighteen
The needle mark's still there. Heh. I think we don't get checked because of the amount of effort that's involved, or that they don't want to know what the results would be, or because it's so easy to trust our partners.
Man, if someone told me I was told I was going to get injected in the penis way beforehand I definitely wouldn't have gone!
Comment by Always Eighteen
Always Eighteen
I'm looking at the ads to the left of this post... "Stop Gum Disease...." "Erectile Dysfuntion" hahah.
Alright I'll tell her. I have a feeling she doesn't want to know though.
Imagine a world where sex was more of a painful duty than a task of pleasure.
Comment by Anonymous